Friend claiming to be straight, keeps clinging onto me
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First and foremost, I want to clarify that I am not a homophobe. So I started Poly and there is this guy who approached me to be friends because he thinks I'm good looking. I'm not bragging here, just stating what happened. He would say that I'm cute in front of the whole class and in the class whatsapp group and calls me handsome. People are calling him gay already and he always reply with the same thing: "I am a normal boy". Like wtf? Isn't that what only aliens would say when they invade earth?
I feel really uncomfortable around him. I told him to stop acting so gay around me and he says"we brothers mah". He calls me brother, cute, handsome and more and treats me like his best friend. He is currently in my clique so I can't avoid him because doing so would mean I would avoid my whole clique. Avoiding him wouldn't work also because he clings to me every single time.
Most of the time, our class are in labs with computers which we can use while listening to our teachers talk. He would most of the time, play childish games or experiment with softwares in the computer and would not listen to the teacher. He would also talk to me about unnecessary useless stuff, causing me to not hear what the teacher is teaching and I have to try very hard to concentrate. I have to put my hand up in his face to tell him to stfu because I want to hear the teacher talk.
So after lessons, he would be the last to leave the classroom because he is either continuing his work or talking to a friend from his secondary school. My clique wanted to eat so we went ahead to the canteen, not wanting to wait for him to finish his work by god knows when or to wait for him to enjoy his chat with his friend. After that, he would say "WHY PANG SEI ME" "QIAN ZHOU AH" which means that he owes me a beating. He would always take his goddamn time to leave the classroom and then says the same old" PANG SEI " nonsense every single time.
Not only that, he always whines about how hard he is struggling in the course. He would tell me that he wants to change course at least twice EVERYDAY. I'm really sick of him because I'm struggling with the course too but he is spreading negativity to me. He also requested to change course to the teachers,jokingly. Most of the time the teacher just ignore him because he also say that to teachers a lot. But sometimes the teachers can fed up hearing him say that that they will say "change lor". I'm begging him in my head to change course because no one wants him here. He won't be missed. Not only that... he wears the same shirt thrice a week. Sometimes he shows off his tiny arm muscles, thinking he is very fit. zz
He is really selfish too. That time he wanted me to follow him because he needs to do something during our break time. I agreed because I didn't want to be a bad friend and I ended up wasting 3/4 of the break time waiting for him to get his job done. After that I wanted to rush up to my class, without eating of course, but he asked me to wait for him to eat because he said "I eat very fast one". I was hesistant but he don't care. I followed him to the canteen and he bought his plate of "shyt". So when he put his plate onto the table, I was like "finally, just eat your shyt and we can go back to class" BUT NO. HE WENT TO A LONG QUEUE BECAUSE HE NEEDS MILO TO DRINK WITH HIS MEAL when we are already going to be late. So I just sat there and wait for him eat and we were late by 10mins, after runnning for a bit.
Sometimes he will criticize you, jokingly, out of nowhere and says "JUST KIDDING" and slams you on the shoulder. This critisicism, which was meant to be a joke, is so bl00dy harsh. After him seeing the offended look on my face, he would then say " DUN ANGRY LAH, DUN CRY LAH" when smiling and looking at my still offended face.
He is really a laughing stock of the class. Blur, because he gets lost around the school campus so easily and couldn't find the table in the canteen where my clique was eating at, when he already put down his bag. Gay, because he calls me cute and handsome and asks to hang out with goodlooking boys from other courses.
He does help me a little bit with my work. Like when I missed what the teachers say, he would repeat it to me but there is so much about him that pisses me off. I have never considered myself to be a homophobe but he is turning me into one. Can anyone give me a solution to how to rid this clingy friend who is so gay? I really am frustrated.
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i balked at the end of the 2nd line
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Well if you don't like what he does, you can:
1) tell him why in a serious tone and make him see your point. Have a calm talk with him. Seems like you have spoken to him whenever he makes you annoyed, but maybe you can try having a proper conversation with him, emphasising it is not a one off incident. Be calm.
2) stay away from him. He might be an example of a toxic friend, and as you grow older, you will understand that it is wise to walk away from toxic friends and not let them take charge of your life.
good luck!
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you are thinking about it too much
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good luck to you....
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That guy got serve NS bo? I was from boys school from pri to sec, JC choose wrong combi, my class suay suay very few girls one. So I no gf b4, but I thought I was straight because I watch porn.
Once I got into NS, it suddenly occured to me one day that I may like guys too, because I can't help staring when we change tgt, and I especially liked looking at the size of their didi. Me was curious and went to search gay porn, don't feel repulsed by it.
So now I don't know what I am. Maybe your friend also like me, somewhere, something awakened a primal instinct in him to like guys, even though he still think he is straight?
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I ve such a fren too(not as jiat lat as your case but can consider as a toxic fren) i think u might wanna use ur body language to avoid him. Like first tell him to stop brothering you and if he still doesn't get it, then totally ignore him You might live a lonely life after that, but i think u will soon find frens that will worth your time. Finally, wish u a great poly life!
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LOL like that also can
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are u done with ur posts-fillers?
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Calm down
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no
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Must be grey area.
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In my opinion, the only difference between a hetrosexual and a homosexual is their sexual orientation - as simple as that. Anything else is usually a matter of that person's personality/character/morals. I have come across (and made) gay friends who are genuinely nice people, and at the same time I know of some who are simply just.. posessive of really.. undesirable traits. You can see it's the same for straight people too - it's a spectrum.
As one of the other posters above mentioned, you are probably just unlucky to have met someone who could be a toxic friend. Try expressing to him your thoughts/how you feel, in a GENTLE yet FIRM manner. Be as honest and objective as you can.
If all else fails, hey, you really don't need toxic friends. Life is short enough as it is.
All the best! :)
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