Sometimes ago I went public with a rather unusual and humiliating experience in Thailand in regard to female sex tourism. During our Thailand holidays my farang girlfriend actively looked for Thai guys and was finally bedded by a young Thai lover.
I initially intended to find out, to how many other farang males something similar happened, either if their girlfriends went alone to Thailand or they even travelled even together with their farang boyfriends, like in my case. From the partially very abusive and insulting reactions I understood, that I probably touched a total taboo subject. Others readers doubted my experience at all. It is a tables are turned situation in a country, which is by some considered as a sex paradise for male Westerners only. Today, I can only conclude that my case is a real rare one, or it happens much more often but the humiliated farang males felt so demeaned, that none ever talks openly about it.
Nevertheless, I still believe that I am probably not they only farang, who had to accept to share his girl with a Thai competitor, or otherwise lose her. Therefore I try again to start a discussion on this taboo subject and hope for some more serious and honest replies: As a student from Germany I visited Thailand together with my girlfriend some
years ago for the first time. Claudia and I were together for three years and she never cheated on me nor did I on her. She is a good looking girl and rather conservative minded. But already during our initial visit I recognized how much she was fascinated by young athletic Thai guys. On the other hand she became extremely jealous when I dared to have a quick look at Thai girls or any other females.
However, probably women’s sexuality must be stronger than a conservative mind set: During our second visit she admitted having sexual fantasies about Thai guys, which I had already suspected for some time! Once having ousted her fantasies and when she realized that she rather provoked a depressed reaction on my side than an outrage, I was totally surprised how she kept pushing on with her ”ideas” with great stubbornness…to let them finally become reality! Only later Claudia admitted that she would not have had dared to ever tell me again her fantasies, would I have reacted outraged. But my reaction obviously boosted her self-confidence to try to let her fantasies come somehow true and not to bury them under feelings of shame and guilt. From this point onwards something changed between us: From day to day she showed more and more openly her interest in Thai men …obviously interpreting my embarrassing helplessness to cope with the situation as silent consent (…which it was not!). There was less and less hiding of her sexual desires and no more false excuses for me…
I do not like to reveal all the details, they are embarrassing and I know, a lot of farang and Thai guys will laugh at me, when reading this report. Anyway, after a week or so she was mentally ready to make an approach. Claudia persuaded me to join her out to some boys bars, ..driven by her desire, but still hesitating. After long lasting and luring eye-contact with young Thai guys, it seemed to me that they quicky understood, what the young farang lady was after but were irritated by my presence. I hated it to see all this youngster queuing for Claudia and asked myself, if they are more greedy for her body or our holiday bugdet. It took two or three nights more and instinctively we both new that my escorting her had became obsolete. She finally became confident enough to roam alone, but always came back early.
It was some days later, when she got a call on her mobile while we were spending the afternoon at our hotel pool at the Golden Palace Hotel, off Sukhumvit Road in Bangkok. She became very exited…and after a while asked me into my face, if I can live with the fact that she intends to date a Thai boy that night, whom she met a night before. I was very jealous but I saw in her eyes how extremely exited she was to date the guy and we both knew well…tonight it will be for paid sex. I asked her ’Claudia, are you really sure…?!’ She swallowed and nodded silently and said ‘Rainer….it has nothing to do with you….it is simply…’.
She intended to take the Thai boy out for some romantic dinner and then come back to the Golden Palace Hotel. She as well as I felt more secure to let it happen in our place, rather then in some unknown seedy place. At the Golden Palace Hotel we were sure that outward guests are all registered, when staying in a guest’s room. On the one hand Claudia wanted to have her first experience with a young Thai stranger in secure, comfortable and familiar surroundings, but on the other hand, she wanted me to be safely excluded and not to spoil in any way what was meant to be her perfect sex. (Later she admitted that she was at this time very insecure, if I, in the end, would not lose my temper and do something stupid, respectively totally freak out in the hotel floors once after I have realised that she is naked on the sheets with the Thai guy!). Strange enough, instead of my burning jealousy, I simply assured her that I will respect her privacy…probably instinctively sensing that my girlfriend was expecting me to no longer be an obstacle to her very special sexual desire. I surrendered to the inevitable situation and hoped all will be fast forgotten after a one night stand, what will hopefully satisfy her desire for good.
Before she went out that evening Claudia rented a second room on another floor for the remaining time in Bangkok without revealing the room number to me. Later that night we left together the Golden Palace Hotel, turned from Soi 1 on to the Sukhumvit Road. In a pharmacy near Siam Square Claudia bought the obligatory condoms. A guy at the counter gave us a dirty smile and said in bad English: “You have fun…!” I thought desperately jealous ‘….for some lucky Thai penis!’ We stepped out into the warm air of a busy Bangkok night.
She checked again nervously her own room key, and the condoms in her handbag. There was something like a ‘oohh, please understand!’ in her eyes when she hugged me and gave me a hasty kiss. Then we separated. ‘There goes my girl, ‘… to meet her date…,’ I thought.
I sat frustrated in one of the cinema complexes at Siam Square and then spent a poor night in an empty double-bed, not daring to imagine what was happening behind one of the doors on an upper floor. I never asked my girlfriend what she paid for the ‘service’ she received. (Claudia remained silent on those nights and I finally respected her privacy).
After a sleepless night, I went down to the breakfast room and passed by the reception. The two Chinese guys of the night shift saw me approaching stopped immediately talking and were extremly polite to me, but when I just left the reception on to the yard they started giggling and I had the suspicion they were amusing themselves on my expense.
I entered the breakfast room and saw Claudia with her new lover at a table. I will never forget how pleased and satisfied she looked, when our eyes first met incidentally. The very attentive Thai guy next to her was relatively tall. I remember how his black hair fall over his forehead and covered one of his eyes. The other one was aggressively watching me.
They let me approach, looked at each other, then Claudia and the Thai gave me a humiliating smile and invited me to join breakfast at their table. The young Thai was clever enough to immediately exploit my insecurity and weakness, when he touched my girlfriend openly in front of me and watched her enjoying his hand on her naked leg. He managed to shatter the rest of my self-confidence and within hours he suffocated my last resistance. What I hoped to be a forgettable one night stand turned out to become a take over of my girl for the remaining holidays. He made it absolutely clear that he would stay in the ‘driver’s seat’ for the rest of our holidays, having good sex and being paid for it by a farang girl! On the other hand I understood from Claudia that she somehow enjoyed the macho-behaviour of her non-western exotic lover and
that the Thai showed no respect whatsoever for the fact that I had been her boyfriend for so many years. Claudia spoke to me for a long time and tried to convince me that it is really only a sex affair with the Thai. She tried to comfort me but was also clear that he will bed her exclusively. Eventually I retreated fearing to lose my girl and his aggressivness towards me decreased.
The winner takes it all!
Later I assisted Claudia to move her remaining cloths from our room to her new room. The Thai was in the bathroom showering. I saw his and her cloth scattered all over the carpet, the toilette paper on the side table and the bed sheets in total disorder. I remember how I swallowed and until today I imagine how they undressed, how he got on top of her and started thrusting my moaning girl.
It happened all so fast that after the holiday I was emotionally struggling for a long time. After our return Claudia did not cheat on me and proved that she was, after all, only interested in hot sex with a young Asian. Occasionally she still sends him some money, but I can live with this. Today I am still together with Claudia and we have engaged. We are honest enough to each other to accept that she will go out again to look for a suitable partner, if we ever go to Thailand again.
Apart from trying to start a discussion on the subject of female sex tourism in Thailand it is for me important to send this report to all those, who still believe that:
1. Asian guys are unable to satisfy farang ladies because of their again and again repeated “myth of smaller penis size” ,
2. who still believe that women sexuality is restricted to certain pattern / types. Claudia overcame her shyness…and finally did only that openly, what many girls, housewives, etc. might secretly think: To enjoy a tropical night with a perfect lover with no regrets.
Rainer