No Love Life, Totally Demoralised,
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I hope not to expect anybody to flame here, only constructive comments.
I come from a broken family. Father was a gambler and sailor, left my family when i was a child. Mother never remarried. Mother then carry the responsibility of raising me and my elder sister, hawking at the roadside.
So, my education never surpass school. I now work as an assistant chef at a hotel. I toil night and day, in the steamy kitchen. Life is hard. I have few friends and no sociel life and yes I work on saturdays and sundays. Sometimes i have to come to shift-work at 3am to prepare the meals for breakfast.
My pay is low. Now life is getting harder for my family and I. My mother's health has not been great. She suffers from acute asthma. My elder sister got married to an abusive husband. He hits her regularly and he borrows money from the loan shark. The loan shark harass him until he left my sister for good. Now my sister have moved in to stay with us. I have regular fights with my sister over the admin of our home and splitting the money for our daily home maintenance.
So here is my story, I met this girl at the hotel we work, she works at the concierge. We've gone out regularly on dates. I fell in love with her. However, as time goes by, she seem not to be very responsive to me anymore. It was then, I realise that one of the hotel managers was persuing her. He was richer and have more money than me. In the end, the girl explained to me that she had to leave me for a better man who can provide her with better security.
I am so heart broken. I am so poor and no matter what I do, I cannot alleviate my situation. I have no time to meet people because of my job.
I feel demoralised, not knowing what hte future lay for me. I don't think I would be able to find any girl who i can support because they all want richer man. I am starting to realise that women here don't want a guy with a simple salary anymore. THeir expectations have gone up sky high, they want a rich guy.
I also feel very stress because I have to support my ailing mother with her high medical expenses and not be able to afford to buy property. Everything is getting expensive but my salary is still the same.
I would like to take additional educational courses to better my life but i have no spare time and not enough money.
I envy all my former schoolmates who have richer parents, sent them overseas to study, now they come back to take over their father's business, have easy life, drive big car and live in big mansions and marry the beautiful wife. These people always go out and lose their smartphones but next day they easily replace them. Me? I am still using a button handphone.
Is life ever fair? No. I have to toil on. I cannot blame this on my parents. I just have to blame it on fate.
I am struggling to uplift my life, wondering what I should do. The future don't look so good but i have to put on a smile.
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If you blame others you will always be unhappy. If you are at peace with your inner self, you will find happiness. - adaptation from Dalai Lama quote.
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Dont look above u always look people below u ,for wife no problem just get a Foriegn talent they r more better then locals in providing thats why they r every where now in spore.
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If you look down on yourself, nobody is going look up on you--adaption from Angel666
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Your english is much better than some of the educated people out there... impressive for someone without an education?
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Well, today you can learn english, japanese, korean, or even Russian by Apps, just download from your favorite app station. Konichiwha
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Originally posted by angel7030:
If you look down on yourself, nobody is going look up on you--adaption from Angel666
i have to look down on myself, so when you blow can look up at me -
Originally posted by angel7030:
Well, today you can learn english, japanese, korean, or even Russian by Apps, just download from your favorite app station. Konichiwha
ASGMai? -
Aiginomoto MSG Mai
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there are 7 billion people in this world.
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And some have $7 billions, some just have a $1 a day
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You upgrade yourself lor....
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Why should life be fair? When you eat animals/plant beacuse you are hungry are you being fair to them?
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If you earn a salary, you will never get rich.
Look at the things you are producing in the hotel. How much are they worth? How much are they paying you?
Be like Ah Tiong, learn the tricks of the trade and then be your own boss.
Select a wife carefully. Like one that makes a good hawker assistant.
There's no reason why you can't live in a three-room HDB flat and own a Mercedes, and afford the best medical care for your mother.
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your mum's house will be your house next time lor
so no need to buyat least old oredi u will hv a roof over ur head
now quickly buy a health insurance for yourself (with rider) <- this is a must and a basic thing in life in expensive singaporebe simple be happy
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To TS, here are my thoughts and opinions.
1) Your English is really good. I'm sure there are other good things about you, but since I do not know you personally, I can only comment based on what I read from here.
2) One key to happiness is to appreciate what you have, rather than being sad about what you don't have. Currently, I notice you are "beating" yourself up over what you don't have, this is a big barrier to happiness.
3) So what are the things you have? I have travelled to some countries, and the people there would loved so much to trade places with you. They are hardworking, good attitude, nice people, but their country is in such bad shaped that they cannot find a job. You'll only start to appreciate what you have when you lose things you are having now, like the fact you're computer literate and you are in good health (otherwise I don't see how you can endure the work hours).
4) I'm sorry you feel sad about some things in your life, but understand this, life is a journey where you will get happy and sad. You are going through a bad period of your life, but it will come a time when that bad period passes, and you're happy again.
5) It's true that most girls are materialistic. Trust me, poor man or rich man, they don't like materialistic girls. Frankly speaking, there is nothing you can do about that, girls have been like this for a long time. At least you get to see her true colors yeah? That's important and good news, because another more qualified and less materialistic girl may come along later and you are still single. But you see it as bad news because of emotional bondage.
6) Whether one situation is good or bad is very hard to tell, it may look like a bad situation now, but later on because of this situation, something better turns out. Let me explain, a guy broke his leg during military training, he was in such agony and curse his bad luck. Why of all people he was the one who slipped and broke his leg? The next day, his entire section was sent out except him and none of them returned, because the enemy ambushed them and killed all of them. Now, suddenly, he thinks, wow I'm so lucky! Life is never certain, just accept it as it is and be grateful nonetheless for what you have.
7) When you are frustrated with your life, you become easily angry. If you're easily angry, you are more likely to argue with someone else. When you argue with someone else, you get more problems. It's a big bad circle that comes back to haunt you. Instead, take note of this and speak nicely, even if you're in a bad mood. This works personally for me, I treat everyone nice, in return they treats me nice, and I repeat the same thing for them, and so a nice circle continues. When someone abuse that niceness, then they get "kicked" out of my circle of friendship, so at the end of my life, what I have collected are the best friends. Other people can keep those bad people I left out of my life, lol.
8) Everybody have problems. Just because you don't see them doesn't mean their problems ain't bigger than yours. Some people went from homeless to billionaires. And if it can happen to them, it can happen to you. This will be the best form of revenge for those girls who left you or look down on you. Where there's a will, there's a way.
9) Jia you!
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see this is the prblem. its steams from the root of the family neucleuas. when you know its hard and you still rais eup children. your sister - bad move. know a gmabler still want to marry him? comon - its not another script for my next short movie? and you - repeating teh same msitake again. your family and life so screwed you still can cock stand? raally if i have lots of problem proballay will go angel's paub one nite stand and be gone with it. you are adding problems to your sky high problems only by gt=etting into the lov shit. so what if you marry the girl? you have the means to take on the whole picture after marriage? or keep raising a half fuck family and addon to the problems once you have baby and children? plan properly, don;t bring babies into this world to suffer like you, and your parents.
simply get narried fuck and have children start a family just cos its religion, culture and beliefs is truely an axcuse or just pure stupidity at work?
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Originally posted by angel7030:
And some have $7 billions, some just have a $1 a day
7 billions rupiah or rupees? -
Originally posted by Frustrated86:
I hope not to expect anybody to flame here, only constructive comments.
I come from a broken family. Father was a gambler and sailor, left my family when i was a child. Mother never remarried. Mother then carry the responsibility of raising me and my elder sister, hawking at the roadside.
So, my education never surpass school. I now work as an assistant chef at a hotel. I toil night and day, in the steamy kitchen. Life is hard. I have few friends and no sociel life and yes I work on saturdays and sundays. Sometimes i have to come to shift-work at 3am to prepare the meals for breakfast.
My pay is low. Now life is getting harder for my family and I. My mother's health has not been great. She suffers from acute asthma. My elder sister got married to an abusive husband. He hits her regularly and he borrows money from the loan shark. The loan shark harass him until he left my sister for good. Now my sister have moved in to stay with us. I have regular fights with my sister over the admin of our home and splitting the money for our daily home maintenance.
So here is my story, I met this girl at the hotel we work, she works at the concierge. We've gone out regularly on dates. I fell in love with her. However, as time goes by, she seem not to be very responsive to me anymore. It was then, I realise that one of the hotel managers was persuing her. He was richer and have more money than me. In the end, the girl explained to me that she had to leave me for a better man who can provide her with better security.
I am so heart broken. I am so poor and no matter what I do, I cannot alleviate my situation. I have no time to meet people because of my job.
I feel demoralised, not knowing what hte future lay for me. I don't think I would be able to find any girl who i can support because they all want richer man. I am starting to realise that women here don't want a guy with a simple salary anymore. THeir expectations have gone up sky high, they want a rich guy.
I also feel very stress because I have to support my ailing mother with her high medical expenses and not be able to afford to buy property. Everything is getting expensive but my salary is still the same.
I would like to take additional educational courses to better my life but i have no spare time and not enough money.
I envy all my former schoolmates who have richer parents, sent them overseas to study, now they come back to take over their father's business, have easy life, drive big car and live in big mansions and marry the beautiful wife. These people always go out and lose their smartphones but next day they easily replace them. Me? I am still using a button handphone.
Is life ever fair? No. I have to toil on. I cannot blame this on my parents. I just have to blame it on fate.
I am struggling to uplift my life, wondering what I should do. The future don't look so good but i have to put on a smile.
Although it may be hard when our early childhood are filled with challenges and difficulties that limit our opportunities in life, ultimately, it is paramount to recognize that though these events do play a significant part in our life, they do not exist in our future - if that isn't how we want the game to end.
You could accept the way how your past was; but it is an entirely different ball game for your future.
It would be a grave mistake to attribute your misery due to the fact that your love interest chose someone else over you because of money alone. The point is that it may help you to cope better emotionally because having this perspective is certainly easier than making a choice to change a seemingly gloomy destiny.
Perhaps what you lack is not merely a lack of opportunities, but a lack of courage.
I do not know you, but for someone who claims to have little education; I felt that you certainly write decent enough to express your ideas and feelings. And working hard to make a decent living despite having a really tough job is resiliency.
I am not here to judge, but rather, I have a few reflective questions for you to evaluate your own situation.
I) If you remained in your current job and your prospect is limited; how much are you willing to risk doing something different so that you could achieve a different outcome?
II) If you imagine yourself upgrading, what would you see yourself learning/doing?
III) How badly do you want to change your own personal destiny? How much are you willing to commit and work on it?
Cheers -
Originally posted by MobTwo:
To TS, here are my thoughts and opinions.
1) Your English is really good. I'm sure there are other good things about you, but since I do not know you personally, I can only comment based on what I read from here.
2) One key to happiness is to appreciate what you have, rather than being sad about what you don't have. Currently, I notice you are "beating" yourself up over what you don't have, this is a big barrier to happiness.
3) So what are the things you have? I have travelled to some countries, and the people there would loved so much to trade places with you. They are hardworking, good attitude, nice people, but their country is in such bad shaped that they cannot find a job. You'll only start to appreciate what you have when you lose things you are having now, like the fact you're computer literate and you are in good health (otherwise I don't see how you can endure the work hours).
4) I'm sorry you feel sad about some things in your life, but understand this, life is a journey where you will get happy and sad. You are going through a bad period of your life, but it will come a time when that bad period passes, and you're happy again.
5) It's true that most girls are materialistic. Trust me, poor man or rich man, they don't like materialistic girls. Frankly speaking, there is nothing you can do about that, girls have been like this for a long time. At least you get to see her true colors yeah? That's important and good news, because another more qualified and less materialistic girl may come along later and you are still single. But you see it as bad news because of emotional bondage.
6) Whether one situation is good or bad is very hard to tell, it may look like a bad situation now, but later on because of this situation, something better turns out. Let me explain, a guy broke his leg during military training, he was in such agony and curse his bad luck. Why of all people he was the one who slipped and broke his leg? The next day, his entire section was sent out except him and none of them returned, because the enemy ambushed them and killed all of them. Now, suddenly, he thinks, wow I'm so lucky! Life is never certain, just accept it as it is and be grateful nonetheless for what you have.
7) When you are frustrated with your life, you become easily angry. If you're easily angry, you are more likely to argue with someone else. When you argue with someone else, you get more problems. It's a big bad circle that comes back to haunt you. Instead, take note of this and speak nicely, even if you're in a bad mood. This works personally for me, I treat everyone nice, in return they treats me nice, and I repeat the same thing for them, and so a nice circle continues. When someone abuse that niceness, then they get "kicked" out of my circle of friendship, so at the end of my life, what I have collected are the best friends. Other people can keep those bad people I left out of my life, lol.
8) Everybody have problems. Just because you don't see them doesn't mean their problems ain't bigger than yours. Some people went from homeless to billionaires. And if it can happen to them, it can happen to you. This will be the best form of revenge for those girls who left you or look down on you. Where there's a will, there's a way.
9) Jia you!
Surprised reading this. read it just at the right time as I'm facing the similar thought as TS. would love to meet more friends like you :) shall we make it happen? -
any 'no money' problem?
comon...
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Originally posted by mcsy86:
Surprised reading this. read it just at the right time as I'm facing the similar thought as TS. would love to meet more friends like you :) shall we make it happen?
MP BBQ gathering or at SJPS, my pubs can provide a good place for meeting, we also provide clean rooms and towels. BF no included -
i b yr bf lor