I can't stop thinking of this guy
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I have been with my bf for about a year now.
The prob wif me is I'm not confident of being alone. I have carried a torch for Another guy for a long time. But I know he can't be with me cos of other personal reasons. Mostlu would be his race. I'm not concerned of looks cos I know eventually it will fade. But I cannot be in this way where I'm neither here or there. Wat should I do ?
Im getting married wif my current bf next year
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Whtz the whole point of this thread?
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Grow up. Dont be such a sissy pants
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If you already know you are going to marry your current bf next year then its time to forget about your past.
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Originally posted by Butt3rcup:
I have been with my bf for about a year now.
The prob wif me is I'm not confident of being alone. I have carried a torch for Another guy for a long time. But I know he can't be with me cos of other personal reasons. Mostlu would be his race. I'm not concerned of looks cos I know eventually it will fade. But I cannot be in this way where I'm neither here or there. Wat should I do ?
Im getting married wif my current bf next year
It appears to me that you might not be emotionally ready for marriage and if you decide to go along with your plans, you might have to pay a higher ticket price for 'future changes'. Though painful as taking ownership of your choice might be, it is still far better than sweeping it under the carpet and thinking that things will just go away.Because ultimately, you just can't run away from yourself.
The fear of being alone is common. However, if the relationship is led by fear and not by love, you would have a lot of self convincing to do when there is presence of 'competition' - even if you are already married by then.
Cheers
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You are getting to your current bf, because he wants to marry you and you go along with that.
What you decide, and how you decide is your own responsibility. It may turn out well, or it may not. Those are just consequences. If it turns out well, just roll along taking care to preserve it. If it does not, then you have take actions to lessen the difficulty.
We all want happiness, some know how to attain it for themselves, some don't.
We all want to avoid unhappiness, some know how, some don't.
The problem with you is that you are not doing anything about the above two.
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how old TS? i think he / she is in a real confused state. i think he she dont know whta he she actually wants. its like buying things, buy buy buy later never use.
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Originally posted by Butt3rcup:
I have been with my bf for about a year now.
The prob wif me is I'm not confident of being alone. I have carried a torch for Another guy for a long time. But I know he can't be with me cos of other personal reasons. Mostlu would be his race. I'm not concerned of looks cos I know eventually it will fade. But I cannot be in this way where I'm neither here or there. Wat should I do ?
Im getting married wif my current bf next year
You do not seem like you are ready for marriage. It seems more as though you are afraid of being alone and somehow u probably felt that getting married to this current bf solves the problem of being lonely.
I believe you should first be clear whether marriage is by love and what you wanted. Stay focused on the person you are going to marry and try to see if thats really what you wanted.
" I have carried a torch for Another guy for a long time. But I know he can't be with me cos of other personal reasons" If you have already carried a torch for another guy a long time, why did you still agree to marry your bf? what is going on in your mind when u agreed? I would suggest you be clear about what you want rather than to still head on to marriage with an unclear mind. Dont do your bf and yourself an injustice.
Assuming that guy is able to be with you, will u be jumping ship to him? and when you are with him, if you feel the same wa again, will you search for someone and jump ship again? Problem is your confidence of being alone.
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i see 3 job opportunities for me. TS marry the good as wearing green beret cuckoo stupid guy - i be photog, TS divorce the cuckoo - i be divorce photog, TS marry the other race guy - me photog again, wait wait wait.... maybe in between TS will carry the baby /babes for these cuckoos wannabe - multikill! mmore 1st month baby photog opprtunities for mi
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You only marry him when you need a companion. Consider yourself selfish. Marriage is a contractual obligation. You better make up your mind before you marry your bf.
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Originally posted by Butt3rcup:
I have been with my bf for about a year now.
The prob wif me is I'm not confident of being alone. I have carried a torch for Another guy for a long time. But I know he can't be with me cos of other personal reasons. Mostlu would be his race. I'm not concerned of looks cos I know eventually it will fade. But I cannot be in this way where I'm neither here or there. Wat should I do ?
Im getting married wif my current bf next year
Are you saying that you're only getting married (or even dating this bf) because you're afraid of being alone? I think you should break up with him because I don't think you truly love him.
You really should be single for a while, enjoy singlehood and love yourself before you decide whether or not you need someone to spend the rest of your life with.
And forget about the other guy, already.
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Well, most divorce lawyers will love TS this type of thinking, eventually, they can earn some fees from her.
If not sure, like me, best choice, dun get marry.
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are you sure you are suitable for marriage with your maturity?
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What to do, some gals just love to wear the bride gown for a day. Many still got no chances leh.
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marry to the wrong person or incompatible after marriage is suffering..........
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Some women love suffering, you can ask counsellor troublsome, he knows best
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guys also lar. they already knew they are probably incompatible in terms of thinking, maturity etc, yet they hope that the marriage will work out. after marriage, both discovered so many patterns all come out and realised they probably made a mistake in getting married.
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Let them suffer lor, if not, they said Love very boring, no life and no fun. And hopefully, all these suffering can help them get enlightened. Mistake is ok, who dun make mistake, but repeating a mistake is consider stupid or simply addict.
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Originally posted by angel7030:
Some women love suffering, you can ask counsellor troublsome, he knows best
i can council you, into getting married. -
Originally posted by angel7030:
Let them suffer lor, if not, they said Love very boring, no life and no fun. And hopefully, all these suffering can help them get enlightened. Mistake is ok, who dun make mistake, but repeating a mistake is consider stupid or simply addict.
no use one lah. when gundo is gundo state. like you whenever you see me behind the cam viewfinder you can pose right?