A v.gd friend held back by her persistent ex-bf
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Originally posted by jojobeach:So if A kills person B, don't you think A is also commiting a crime ?
What makes you think person B has no one to love and cares ?
Person B also may has a family who loves him. He may also be a father or a husband to someone else.
Two wrongs does not make one right.
Haiz.... now it's not even talking about too many grey areas. It's way below that.So you are saying that Just because one is a needy , means he/she has the right to commit crime ???
If a person is sex addict and cannot help himself because he is mentally ill, does it make it forgivable to rape your daughter ???[/quote]
Haiz, don't put words in other people's mouths.Life is complex if there is not a clear line between black or white, right or wrong. Life is complex when there exists too many grey areas.
I pretty much agree with him about the being extreme part. It's one thing to be clear cut, but it's a different to be way over and extreme. Sometimes, if you don't take things into totality, you will jump to wrong conclusions. Like saying all man are gullible, assuming every guy is a lecher and a pervert, thinking a parent displays a different love just because he is a father of sons and not daughters.So no, contrary to what you think of me. I make my life simple by trying my best to be clear cut about my opinions.[quote]And no, I think of my glass as half full.It seriously doesn't seem like that. Note that this is coming from more than one person. At least, you always seem very negative where guys are concerned. -
What do you know ???Originally posted by SumOne:It seriously doesn't seem like that. Note that this is coming from more than one person. At least, you always seem very negative where guys are concerned.
Frankly, do you think I care about how you judge me ? -
"Extremely" is a word too extreme to be used against someone seeking to bring a different perspective to the issue at hand.Originally posted by SumOne:I'm not saying what you say doesn't make sense, but your post brings it in an extremely different direction and meaning from what Ryosuke was saying it. It's like, he is saying this but you want to totally bring the conversation a different way to make a different point.
Note that as much as I disagree with your postings. I don't put it all down to merely "extreme" or "negative" or such .
If you cannot look at things from different angles, you are not a very effective thinker.
The world is not flat, neither should your thoughts be. -
Contrary to what you think, "extreme" and "different" perspective are not the same thing to me.Originally posted by jojobeach:"Extremely" is a word too extreme to be used against someone seeking to bring a different perspective to the issue at hand.
I think you need to listen to your own advice. It was my point to you all along..... Still, thanks for your advice and noted, with or without the sarcasm. Also, even though it may not really apply to me.Note that as much as I disagree with your postings. I don't put it all down to merely "extreme" or "negative" or such .[/quote]
Because it's not?[quote]If you cannot look at things from different angles, you are not a very effective thinker.
The world is not flat, neither should your thoughts be. -
SumOne,
Honestly, based purely on your replies to my postings.
I seriously believe you don't know what you want.
If all you seek is a agreement or validation to your postings.
Sorry, I am not one who prefers to patronise.
So tell me SumOne, what is it you seek ?
To be proven correct ?
To set rules on how forumers should post their view ?
Please do not go around policing how others should or should not think. Or how they should post their messages.
You don't go around telling others how they should wear their clothes do you ?? I hope not. -
Enough to know what I'm seeing. I'm not saying I know a lot, but yeah, I get the idea here. Your manner of response does confirm certain things I and another have discussed. But like you said, it doesn't bother you.Originally posted by jojobeach:What do you know ???
Frankly, do you think I care about how you judge me ?
I am not judging you or anything, but I can only ask that you heed your own advice. To take things into totality and have a wider perspective of things. If you cannot look at things from different angles, you are not a very effective thinker. Different angles would also mean how people intended it, not how you put your own meaning into it. Jumping to conclusions is not what an effective thinker does either.
The world is not flat, neither should your thoughts be.
"All guys are gullible?"
"All guys are chi ko phek?"
The fact that you are able to say these things to me shows what I'm trying to tell you is not anything new, I just hope you listen to your own advice. -
Ahhhh.. and the truth shows itself....Originally posted by SumOne:Enough to know what I'm seeing. I'm not saying I know a lot, but yeah, I get the idea here. Your manner of response does confirm certain things I and another have discussed. But like you said, it doesn't bother you.
I am not judging you or anything, but I can only ask that you heed your own advice. To take things into totality and have a wider perspective of things. If you cannot look at things from different angles, you are not a very effective thinker. Different angles would also mean how people intended it, not how you put your own meaning into it. Jumping to conclusions is not what an effective thinker does either.
The world is not flat, neither should your thoughts be.
"All guys are gullible?"
"All guys are chi ko phek?"
The fact that you are able to say these things to me shows what I'm trying to tell you is not anything new, I just hope you listen to your own advice.
I laughed when I read this reply.
When you say I jump to conclusions.
Arn't you also jumping to conclusions too ?
Guys are gullible if they proved themselves to be.
Guys are chi ko phek if they proved themselves to be. -
I know what I want, and it's none of the above.Originally posted by jojobeach:SumOne,
Honestly, based purely on your replies to my postings.
I seriously believe you don't know what you want.
If all you seek is a agreement or validation to your postings.
Sorry, I am not one who prefers to patronise.
So tell me SumOne, what is it you seek ?
To be proven correct ?
To set rules on how forumers should post their view ?
I think you understand already by now, I'd give you enough credit for that. The fact that you know what to disagree about my posts says a lot in itself. I think you're aware of your own actions and posts as well even if I really am the first to point them out to you.Please do not go around policing how others should or should not think. Or how they should post their messages. [/quote]
I think you're mistaken, really. Don't jump to conclusions again.[quote]Because the bottom line is that thoughts and opinions get's across to the receiving party.
But if you really want a statement from me, then it would be to follow your own advice. -
I'm glad it amuses you, but just hope you can see the truth behind it.Originally posted by jojobeach:Ahhhh.. and the truth shows itself....
I laughed when I read this reply.
Again you sidestep the point altogether, and put on a different meaning from what I was saying. In any case, I don't see any need to clarify the above examples. But you've basically proven to me the mindset you have, especially where guys are concerned.When you say I jump to conclusions.
Arn't you also jumping to conclusions too ?[/quote]
No.
[quote]Guys are gullible if they proved themselves to be.
Guys are chi ko phek if they proved themselves to be. -
whatever ~ -
Dear jojo,
I've seen enough of your posts to know I'm not jumping to conclusions. You perhaps will defend yourself by stating otherwise, no comments on that. I don't wish to let you carry this conversation in a different direction and meaning again, but I'll just leave you with the following.
If you cannot look at things from different angles, you are not a very effective thinker.
The world is not flat, neither should your thoughts be. -
I know you understand the logic. Good night jojo.Originally posted by jojobeach: whatever ~
-A feminist gone too far is as bad as an MCP- -
And yes I understand my logic. I just don't care about yours.Originally posted by SumOne:I know you understand the logic. Good night jojo.
-A feminist gone too far is as bad as an MCP-
Good night. -
Originally posted by jojobeach:And yes I understand my logic. I just don't care about yours.
Good night.
Once again, you prove the point. Good night Jojo.... -
Once again you proved the point. you're really worst than my mother.Originally posted by SumOne: Once again, you prove the point. Good night Jojo.... -
Originally posted by jojobeach:Once again you proved the point. you're really worst than my mother. not that you ever made that point earlier in the first place.
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I thought my thread dead.
Anyway, if anyone of you is still interested..
This weekend went on, was with her for two days.
Well i do not know the extend of her intention towards her ex-bf, every small action from her got my imagination running wild.
Yes, Im having a fucking hard time dealing with this matter.
So if anyone of you could help me direct my approach, please say so.
I'm planning to hold her hand soon and do a face to face confess. I must fight.
I must leave my comfort zone so my reward would be given in surprise.
I have come so far, there is simply no way for me to say throw down my towel. -
Hey man, based on what has been said and what you are telling us. She will not choose you despite not going back to her ex. She has already dropped hints that she is not considering you.Originally posted by DaExodus:I thought my thread dead.
Anyway, if anyone of you is still interested..
This weekend went on, was with her for two days.
Well i do not know the extend of her intention towards her ex-bf, every small action from her got my imagination running wild.
Yes, Im having a fucking hard time dealing with this matter.
So if anyone of you could help me direct my approach, please say so.
I'm planning to hold her hand soon and do a face to face confess. I must fight.
I must leave my comfort zone so my reward would be given in surprise.
I have come so far, there is simply no way for me to say throw down my towel.
Ultimately, you do what you feel like doing and I can only say be true to your heart. But honestly, it doesn't seem promising now, especially since you really seem to want to make her your gf now. Whatever you do has to be sincere. But if it's not meant to be, then let it go.
Just continue to be her friend because the very least she would want to is to lose a friend. Whatever happens in future, happens. But for now, don't force it no matter how much you feel like it. It's not a good idea to persist after she has said no, well kind of.
That's my suggestion, ultimately whatever you do, you must feel comfortable doing it. -
TS, be a MAN. Do the right thing.Originally posted by DaExodus:I thought my thread dead.
Anyway, if anyone of you is still interested..
This weekend went on, was with her for two days.
Well i do not know the extend of her intention towards her ex-bf, every small action from her got my imagination running wild.
Yes, Im having a fucking hard time dealing with this matter.
So if anyone of you could help me direct my approach, please say so.
I'm planning to hold her hand soon and do a face to face confess. I must fight.
I must leave my comfort zone so my reward would be given in surprise.
I have come so far, there is simply no way for me to say throw down my towel.
Im not asking you to bash the other guy up. Ask yourself what do you really want from her? Sex, relationship or both? Or is it just the pride for your sake so that it feels good to win a girl from a rival? Or is it everything? What do you really want ? I think you are just fighting for yourself.
Im telling you confessing to her will get you rejected again because she has rejected you before. Im telling you not wasting your time on someone who doesn't feel it for you is the smartest move you can make. When a girl doesn't feel it for you, you can do nothing.
In fact, the best thing you can do right now is nothing. Better still, get to know a few more girls. You are placing too much value on that girl who may be overpriced to say the least. What has she done to deserve your reward? Kinda like some overpaid people in Singapore now? Anyway, what I will do is just delete her number and all her messages. Then you will not think about her...makes you strong.
doko -
note what I mentioned, as SumOne said, I did not say the crimes are totally forgivable.Originally posted by jojobeach:So if A kills person B, don't you think A is also commiting a crime ?
What makes you think person B has no one to love and cares ?
Person B also may has a family who loves him. He may also be a father or a husband to someone else.
Two wrongs does not make one right.
So you are saying that Just because one is a needy , means he/she has the right to commit crime ???
If a person is sex addict and cannot help himself because he is mentally ill, does it make it forgivable to rape your daughter ???
Life is complex if there is not a clear line between black or white, right or wrong. Life is complex when there exists too many grey areas.
So no, contrary to what you think of me. I make my life simple by trying my best to be clear cut about my opinions.
And no, I think of my glass as half full.
On the contrary to what you tell me, you seemed to think that life is black and white. You do not look at life as grey. To you a crime is a crime. You don't seem to care about the reasons behind it.
Life is never complex. Its coz you want to look at it in that way that its complex. I also don't think you are making life simple for yourself. Till now, I find that you are a negative and pessimistic person.
I have read your posts with SumOne, and you are reaching the boundary of being nasty. At least 2 forum-lites here both think you are too extreme, not only one (so you cannot say that SumOne thinks the world of himself)
Finally, as I mentioned before, remember what you wrote in another thread.
"Before you point fingers at others, self-reflect on yourself". Its as what SumOne said, you don't seem to heed your own advice. -
of coz I am interested. That's why SumOne and I are telling jojoBeach she's too extreme and negative.Originally posted by DaExodus:I thought my thread dead.
Anyway, if anyone of you is still interested..
This weekend went on, was with her for two days.
Well i do not know the extend of her intention towards her ex-bf, every small action from her got my imagination running wild.
Yes, Im having a fucking hard time dealing with this matter.
So if anyone of you could help me direct my approach, please say so.
I'm planning to hold her hand soon and do a face to face confess. I must fight.
I must leave my comfort zone so my reward would be given in surprise.
I have come so far, there is simply no way for me to say throw down my towel.
Anyway, I do not know enough to say much, but did she reject you before? If she had done the 'soft' approach like what jojoBeach said (eg 'I need to study', 'I am not sure', 'i do not know', which I think is just selfish acts of keeping spare tyres at hand), and you cannot take it, then go ahead and attempt a direct approach, and get an absolute yes or no answer
Ultimately, I am not interested in gals whom think they are pretty and use that to their advantage (NOTE: I use the word, THINK they are pretty) and get a long waiting list. I don't envy them. In fact, I sympathise with them.
If your gal is like that, and you cannot close this chapter in your life until you get an absolute answer, then go ahead and do the face to face confession. But BE PREPARED. If she is the type of gals like what jojoBeach spoke about, then your chances of success is lesser than failure.
When that happens, forget about her, go out with friends, enjoy life.
When I was younger, I was also pining for a relationship. Actually what I think I should have done on hindsight was to expand my social network more, have more fun, coz that's what you have now, FREEDOM! When you get older and settle down, there are responsibilities and burdens.
So, do what you need so that you don't regret, but move on if it does not give the result that you want.
You can msg me if you wish to speak privately and give me more details. -
ah yes... this society is not as utopian as we all want it to be, true.Originally posted by jojobeach:Why does a property fetch a higher price than other property ?
There are attributes that the owner knows is more desirable to the public. That's why it commands a higher price.
If this society we live in is not as shallow as you want to believe, looks and outer beauty will NOT have become one of the factor in partner selection.
HOwever, this is not so.
We live in a world where looks matters. We are attracted to good looking things.
That is a fact we cannot ignore.
When you go and see a property, you look at the external factor.
Does it suit your taste ? Is the surrounding nice ? Is the area too noisy ?
Then you walk into the house and decide if the layout is what you need.
However, true, looks can be achieve with cosmetics.
Would you invest your whole life savings in a property that looks like a poop shed ? Perhaps you will, if you can see the potential in developing the ugly shed into a world class resort.
However, 1st impressions only count so much. Beauty is just like your degree certification. It opens the door to opportunities. But if the person is stupid, moronic, no inner personality, to back up the beauty/degree, then they will be kicked out.
You can even relate your Beauty idea to some Indians from India. They talk talk talk talk talk, but has no substance to back it up, and many of them then get send back to India.
And also, your analogy on a property is not really correct. In theory, when you said you walk into the house and look at the layout, the correct comparison would be that you look at a gal/guy and able to see her inner personality. Thus, if their inner personality would be as easy as walking into the house to look at the layout, then beauty is not the topmost priority.
Finally even you admit, a place with a watershed, may turned out to be the investment of your lifetime. A person whom is not as attractive physically, may turn out to be the person of your lifetime.
So you are contradicting yourself. Are you saying that beauty IS the deciding factor, or beauty is ONE of the deciding factors? Coz end of the day, I am just saying beauty is one of the many factors, and this is the point you are contending with me now. -
OK, let's see what is the outcome of TS on this issue.
Am I really being pessimistic/negative or am I being realistic.
TS please, do let us know if the girl has accepted you after your truthful declaration of your feelings for her. -
Erm.... Not everything is related directly to the TS's incident alone. Some of the things I have said were about you directly. I hope you can see the difference and not intentionally miss it.Originally posted by jojobeach:OK, let's see what is the outcome of TS on this issue.
Am I really being pessimistic/negative or am I being realistic.
TS please, do let us know if the girl has accepted you after your truthful declaration of your feelings for her.
Whatever the outcome of TS's approach, whether he gets accepted or rejected, does not change what I or in fact, a few others were trying to tell you specifically.
My posts and suggestions about the TS's situation is a different thing altogether. Those I directed to TS directly, and not to you. I want to make that distinction there at least, in case you change the meaning again. -
Actually, come to think of it. My logic was essentially this.Originally posted by jojobeach:And yes I understand my logic. I just don't care about yours.
Good night.
If you cannot look at things from different angles, you are not a very effective thinker.
The world is not flat, neither should your thoughts be.